Smoonch

In case you're wondering, this is a little frog who's glued himself to the outside of our window in Costa Rica. I think he is a great representation of how I feel things are for me at present. Firstly, it's quite amusing, to see a frog, smoonched onto the outside of one's window. Hello! How did you get here? How and why did such a little guy aspire to get himself into that position? Was it like the Ant, who Can't, climb that rubber tree plant? Or did he just partake in the hoppiness that makes frogs frogs? Then, ooops! now what??? better hold on for dear life, and all a frog can do to hold on is smoonch, so there he his.... and where is "there"? Stuck on a transparent surface, wishing, maybe, he could get down, and continue on his froggy way. Or perhaps an opportunity to be more froggy might come along, and there are a few little critters flying around the light, and there's some interesting things happening on the other side of the window that I'd like to check out, so I smoonch.

OK, so I really want to get out of the frog's head now. There's enough floating around in my own to try to (flp-pflp!...scuse me, there was a nice little fly, buzzing right around my head right then).

um.

I got an email from Michael in Nosara. The project has been named, and things are proceeding. It's called Nosara Organic Farm. There is a meeting slotted for the beginning of May, at which it's hoped that anyone interested in helping with land, money, hands-on involvement, organization of several different layers of community and co operative gardening will step forthh. I am extremely happy that I was able to contribute to and inspire the inception of a gathering to create an organization of great minds. I just wish I could go!!! I know that my input is valuable, and having spent 2 months studying how to garden there, who's who in the gardening and food world, how the culture would best receive local food production, I know that this meeting would be the next step to the process. Alas, it's happening without me. There I am, hanging on the window, watching from outside. There have been a few discussions about getting back down to Nosara, this time with my husband, but nothing firm yet. I'm working on getting some air miles. Anyone got any they don't need?

That's 1/2 of my world. What's happening on this side of the glass is that plans for rebuilding the CSA have become a catch 22 situation (wait for it). When I came home from Costa Rica in February, full of ideas for home, raring to go on the permaculture front, I didn't have the plan set out. I just knew that this was where my heart lies, and that I'd push forth, hopping to great heights. SMOONCH. See, the problem is that I've promised Randy that I would not dive right in and make plans to have retreats, rebuild the CSA, house WWOOFers and apprentices and volunteers, for a year. This is why my husband is good for me. I like change, embrace building and creating and networking. Randy loves the turtle's way, slow and steady wins the race. He's all about plugging away at something 'til it's done. He sees the big picture.

So, the catch 22 is that without housing for these WWOOFers and apprentices and volunteers, I can't start the garden. Without the garden, there is no seed money (pardon pun). Without the seed money, there is no housing.

I see these as pesky practical stuff (the PPS). The PPS have slowed me down to the point of not knowing how much to plant in the garden. I could get things going again, and know that at least some of my wonderful CSA members would be on board with receiving a bin again. But that requires work that my back should not do on it's own. I could redirect, and find outside work, but then getting the place ready for labourers would not happen (I do know myself). I could find my other passion, art, again, and use it to stay home, stay focused on the visual aspect of our place, and make a little money. This option is the most current, and has not yet been totally played out in my head. I think the reluctance that I'm feeling here might be that there is a lot of work that goes into entrepreneurship and this would add things to my plate.

Hello! How did I get here? I am unable to decide where to go next. I hope that smoonching onto the window allows me to see both sides of the glass, maybe catch a glimpse of what should happen next, and maybe catch some morsel that will nourish.

In Permaculture, all things on the edge are teaming with life. The edge of the forest, where the good top soil blows and settles creates a pocket of good growing conditions for plants, and therefore the animals that eat those plants. The animals then leave their manure there, further nourishing that space, and continuing the life cycle. I'm on the edge of something...