It occurred to me last night, while bending into unrealistic shapes at yoga, and looking around at my neighbours, on their mats, in various degrees of tilt, shake and sweat (it was our first session in our little rural community), that there is a juxtaposition in the meditative quality of most things that humans do.
Here we are, grunting and teetering, extending muscles that we didn't even know we have, and we are to look within ourselves and accept the beauty, that we "already have what it takes within us". Now, I am not making fun of this lovely practice. I LOVE this practice. It makes me happy. It makes me feel so good. It's gentle, kind, and allows for mistakes. It encompasses and is not exclusive. And yet we strain.
Perhaps it's the human condition at which I am shaking my head. Pause for reflection is most likely what got the majority of us in such a state that we feel we need yoga. Like the Yogis (bear with me on this one, it might be a stretch.... ooo!) who sit in obedient prayer for hours and hours, creating tightness in their bodies, daily we look within ourselves and also create tension.
Do these sound familiar?
~I ask myself every day to write a to-do list, and beat myself up if all the points are not scratched out by bedtime.
~And again in the morning when I transfer those things to today.
~I look at each person I know and wish to emulate some part of that person, seeing not the beauty in my own individuality, but dumping "I should"s on myself, heaping more and more on my mental lists as I see more (creativity/productivity/kindness/industriousness...) in all the people around me.
~I beat myself up for every mistake, using language that I'd never use with loved ones, telling myself I am no good at (...)
I could go on, but it would only fuel fires.
To put the fire out, we eat, or we drink, or dive into prime time tv, jump on the net, which acts as no net, I can tell you. When these things provide a great bit #fail, we might turn to something kinder, gentler, a way to ease our aching soul. And we push a little harder, and strain, reaching for that peace, that relief from inner voice.
Today, I remind myself, that I came, imperfect into this world. And that I may have heaped multitudes of microsins on my shoulders. And that it's the opening up to let all that I need, which was already there, waiting, into the space I've created for such things that is causing the ache there. I am undoing years of unkindness to myself.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
The days are pulling out..
This thought came to mind as I watched two great huge thing-a-ma-jigs pull past our place recently. They looked like long (about 3 houses long) propane tanks. Perhaps they were; they came from the gas plant that is being systematically dismantled 7 miles down the road from us. I get all sorts of cool things passing by on the highway, including herds of over 100 Harley Davidsons, and houses. Yes, I sit in my living room and watch as someone's domicile waits for the power company crew to lift the wires so that it can go to it's resting place.
I think of a term an English friend uses in the spring, when "the nights are pulling out" and flip it, now, in the Fall, thinking instead "the days are pulling out." The leaves are all but gone, the night temperatures are much cooler, promising snow soon. So, thing-a-ma-jigs, Harleys, homes and days, are all pulling away.
These things all leave behind them a void where instead of work for the community, a sense of freedom and light, and even a family's space to live, there's...what? More work fills the space, merri-making and light are created indoors and new buildings go up. A spiral of activity, following the path of the seasons, go round and round and round, not ceasing, and sometimes not even slowing to catch breath or take note of inner, deeper needs.
If, by chance, you've had time to sit and read this post, then perhaps you've started scaling back already. Good. If you find yourself saying "I don't have time" to too many things that you want to do, then read on just a wee bit. Say "no" to something this week. Ask a friend or coworker or fellow club member if they can do it. With the time you've gained by saying no (good for you, btw!) try spending it in a quiet place, away from hubbub. Try gathering your core needs and putting them into a list of 3 things. Work toward them for the rest of the week. Enjoy. Share, if you feel you have time. Thanks.
~The World Changer’s Commitment: “I have chosen to change society and I also choose to be intelligent in the way I go about it. The future needs me well-rested, well-organised, well-nourished and well-exercised … If I am not enjoying what I am doing then there is something wrong with the way I am doing it and I will correct it”.~
I think of a term an English friend uses in the spring, when "the nights are pulling out" and flip it, now, in the Fall, thinking instead "the days are pulling out." The leaves are all but gone, the night temperatures are much cooler, promising snow soon. So, thing-a-ma-jigs, Harleys, homes and days, are all pulling away.
These things all leave behind them a void where instead of work for the community, a sense of freedom and light, and even a family's space to live, there's...what? More work fills the space, merri-making and light are created indoors and new buildings go up. A spiral of activity, following the path of the seasons, go round and round and round, not ceasing, and sometimes not even slowing to catch breath or take note of inner, deeper needs.
If, by chance, you've had time to sit and read this post, then perhaps you've started scaling back already. Good. If you find yourself saying "I don't have time" to too many things that you want to do, then read on just a wee bit. Say "no" to something this week. Ask a friend or coworker or fellow club member if they can do it. With the time you've gained by saying no (good for you, btw!) try spending it in a quiet place, away from hubbub. Try gathering your core needs and putting them into a list of 3 things. Work toward them for the rest of the week. Enjoy. Share, if you feel you have time. Thanks.
~The World Changer’s Commitment: “I have chosen to change society and I also choose to be intelligent in the way I go about it. The future needs me well-rested, well-organised, well-nourished and well-exercised … If I am not enjoying what I am doing then there is something wrong with the way I am doing it and I will correct it”.~
Saturday, October 9, 2010
Moving cows
Late summer, I got a call from my neighbour. "Got any extra bodies that can come help move cows?". I jumped at the chance. These neighbours custom graze other people's cattle. They get herds from various farmers, put them together in the same field, feed them up nice and fat and return them in the fall, getting paid for the difference in weight from beginning to end.
Upon arriving, I was told to stand at the corner, beside the white electric fence Deanna set up. I told her "I've never done this before" (suddenly realizing I could not personally stop a stampede). "Don't wave, don't shout, just stand there so they know not to go that way". I know from reading Michael Pollen's account of Joel Salatin's farming methods that these cattle are moved frequently from field to field, allowed to munch on fresh grass. Because they are allowed to eat the most nutritious part of the grass before the gates open up to the next smorgasbord of grass, they are always eager to move from field to field.
Deanna opened the gate and started her call for the cattle to follow "Cow Boss! Cow Boss!!" This is what Deanna's husband, Leon has always used to call the cattle.
Slowly at first, then at a fast-paced walk, the 350 1000-ish lb animals went across the road. It was eerily quiet, very unlike the stampede I thought I might witness.
It was all over in a matter of minutes. I was little help.
Very shortly after, I read on Deanna's facebook status that the cows had gone back to their owners.
Upon arriving, I was told to stand at the corner, beside the white electric fence Deanna set up. I told her "I've never done this before" (suddenly realizing I could not personally stop a stampede). "Don't wave, don't shout, just stand there so they know not to go that way". I know from reading Michael Pollen's account of Joel Salatin's farming methods that these cattle are moved frequently from field to field, allowed to munch on fresh grass. Because they are allowed to eat the most nutritious part of the grass before the gates open up to the next smorgasbord of grass, they are always eager to move from field to field. 
Deanna opened the gate and started her call for the cattle to follow "Cow Boss! Cow Boss!!" This is what Deanna's husband, Leon has always used to call the cattle.
Slowly at first, then at a fast-paced walk, the 350 1000-ish lb animals went across the road. It was eerily quiet, very unlike the stampede I thought I might witness. 
It was all over in a matter of minutes. I was little help. 
Very shortly after, I read on Deanna's facebook status that the cows had gone back to their owners. A great story from Deanna: Husband Leon stood, looking at a herd while talking with a cattle owner at the latter's farm. Some of the cattle they were looking at had been to Deanna's and Leon's farm. Leon shouted "Cow Boss!" and the heads of each of the cows who'd been custom grazed lifted above the backs of the other cows and looked Leon's way. "Well," said the other farmer "you named them!"
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